These excercising Americans are so bizzare ooooooo!

17 Jan

Although there are people that work out in Nigeria, exercising isn’t nearly as common here as it is in America. I have been keeping a regular running schedule as a way to help use up the gratuitous amounts of palm oil and yams I have been consuming. Every time I go for a run, at least once during my run a group of little kids starts chasing me singing the ever popular jingle, “Òyìnbó pepè, chúgúchúgú pepè,” which means “White person sweet as a pepper, looks like a pepper” (referring to the fact that white people get red in the sun). Other times, people stop in cars and yell, or stop me when they are walking past to ask various questions like, “Oyinbo, what are you running from? Where are you going? Where is the fire? Let me pick you!” Similarly, those who choose to say nothing as I pass usually glare or look at me with a half-frown on their face to display their sheer inability to understand why I am running. Others will yell, “Oyinbo! Well done oo!” Normally I turn my headphones up loud enough to ignore these types of distractions. Therefore, early Sunday morning on my usual jog I didn’t think twice as I was approaching a very old hunchbacked man from behind. I was crossing a bridge over a dam in a quiet part of campus not highly frequented by pedestrians. As I was zoning out enjoying the jams on my ipod, the man suddenly turned around with a wicked grimace on his face. When I was about six feet behind him, he drew a machete from his left gbada (a long robe men wear) pocket and held it in the air ready to strike! I quickly stopped, prostrated, and began to apologize profusely with whatever Yoruba words I could fit in between gasps. Once he realized I wasn’t the thug he though I was based on my heavy breathing and pounding footsteps, he quickly dropped the two-foot long blade and also apologized. His reaction certainly did nothing to calm my heavy breathing, but after a few minutes of thinking about the situation after I continued to run, I burst out laughing. Although I felt bad for scaring the crap out of the poor old man, I found it hilarious that someone casually exercising was so strange to the old man that his first inclination was to draw his machete in defense of a possible oncoming thug-at 10AM on a Sunday morning. Nigeria ooooooo!

15 Responses to “These excercising Americans are so bizzare ooooooo!”

  1. Karen Born January 17, 2011 at 2:41 PM #

    Quick thinking on your part in rapidly explaining yourself! You seem to be quite the anomaly to the people there…

  2. Gene January 17, 2011 at 5:31 PM #

    Nice blog, I just discover it few days ago, I’ll will read it with great interest. I’m Belgian, maried to a Nigerian men. I was in Ibadan last November for the first time.
    Take care
    Gene

  3. Steve January 20, 2011 at 4:50 PM #

    Very humorous! A question that begs an answer…why does this man need, or think he needs, to carry a machete on his person while strolling the UI campus? Is he a concerned horticulturist, ready at a moments notice to cut down undesireale vegetation? Just curious.

  4. Bola lati Toronto January 21, 2011 at 3:53 AM #

    LOL … cant blame my ppl, we live by instincts

  5. Toni January 21, 2011 at 6:07 AM #

    lol….noooo.thats scary :O. True ppl in nigeria dont often go jugging except in certain areas, we mostly stick to exercising at the gym. Thats why a lot of ppl hv treadmills at home to avoid getting our heads chopped off, lol..

  6. Oby January 23, 2011 at 1:45 AM #

    Oh my, that was very funny. I love the part about people asking you what are you running from or where is the fire. That is one of the main reasons people run on the streets – to get away from trouble brewing somewhere. Omo oyinbo, pple no dey jog for Nigeria on the street o! I am glad you responded to the elderly man quick and respectfully.

    P.S. I hope it is ok if I post your blog on my fb.

  7. Tinuola Ajayi January 24, 2011 at 12:13 AM #

    Lol…. Hilarious. But then again there are
    A lot of crazy people in UI and even more
    Here in UCH. Lol. Nevertheless I really salute
    your courage and persistence despite the
    Distractions. Hey… Might even go jogging
    Tomorrow morning before hitting class……… Naaaaa so not going
    To happen. Cheers man!

  8. Seun February 10, 2011 at 7:27 PM #

    I have laughed my head off and almost fell off my seat. Nigerians will of course ask you who is chasing you and what you are running from. The old man is so funny. I wonder why he had the machete with him. I’m glad you were able to apologise and explain yourself. I wish I could have heard you when you were pleading your case with it. Thanks for a great pose.🙂

  9. bolanle February 26, 2011 at 9:39 PM #

    OMG!!! I’m laughing and crying at the same time.
    The great thing abt Nigerians is that there is humour in everything we do.
    When u see a nigerian running its likely because he has perceived danger,
    Funny he is most likely running into the danger.

  10. bolanle February 26, 2011 at 9:41 PM #

    OMG!!! I’m laughing and crying at the same time.
    The great thing abt Nigerians is that there is humour in everything we do.
    When u see a nigerian running, it’s likely because he has perceived danger,
    Funny he is most likely running into the danger.

  11. Faridah March 8, 2011 at 12:42 AM #

    LMAO! I cant even jog in my estate! You try oo! Well done

  12. Dith March 9, 2011 at 10:15 AM #

    ROTFLMAO!!!

  13. Ade March 17, 2011 at 2:04 AM #

    That’s some really funny stuff. How do you know he mistaken you for a thug? Did he say so?

    • tindla April 2, 2011 at 10:09 PM #

      Haha my goodness how funny oooo! But it must have been scary as hell to have an actual weapon drawn at ya. Thank you for this post, very entertaining and interesting.

  14. clc December 30, 2011 at 11:43 PM #

    Lol! Hilarious! I’ve seen people [Nigerians & Oyinbos🙂 ] jogging in various neighbourhoods (Old/New Bodija and some of the GRAs) without trouble. I always thought UI was pretty harmless but I guess not🙂

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